I went for my 40 week appointment on Friday April 4th, feeling pretty discouraged that I wasn't experiencing any signs of labor despite nightly walks, eating labor-inducing foods, and continuing to work. My mom and sister had been here for almost 2 weeks at that point, convinced that I would pop early, and I was beginning to fear that they would have to extend their flights just to get to meet the kid. At my appointment, my midwife let me know me know that I hadn't begun to dilate, however my blood pressure was really high (something that hadn't been an issue before). She suggested we go to the hospital to have it checked out, and was confident that they would induce me since I was full term.
At 3pm we arrived at the hospital. They did blood and urine work and determined that I had developed pre-eclampsia sometime within the last two weeks. The good news was that it meant I would be admitted and induced and, "we're gonna have a baby!" said the OBGYN. My mom and sister rushed home to grab the hospital bag, baby bag, and all of my birthing supplies.
The biggest concern with laboring with pre-eclampsia is that you'll have seizures. So they put me on a magnesium drip, which served as a muscle relaxer and would prevent any seizures. Unfortunately that meant that I wasn't allowed to get out of bed, not under any circumstances. Within about an hour, I had had blood drawn, IV inserted, magnesium started, and a foley catheter inserted. Initiate first emotional meltdown. I think it was just the realization that nothing was going the way I had anticipated. Not that I was naive enough to think that everything would be a breeze, but this was certainly not how I had pictured L&D. Also, the lovely young nurse who inserted the catheter without warning asked us what day it was, and then for the time.
Jesse and I had planned and prepared for a natural birth, and I was also really disappointed that I could no longer do that. I was banking on being able to walk around, use my birthing ball, and sit in the shower. Even if we pretended like the pitocin didn't take away from the "natural" birth, I knew I wouldn't be able to deliver without pain meds if I had to stay in bed.
Shortly after everything was started, a doctor came in and explained that they were going to insert a balloon to help me start dilating. Every 30 minutes a nurse came in and inflated it a little bit, until it was able to fall out on its own. About 2 hours later it came out, which meant I was at 4cm and they could start the pitocin. "Just a few more hours" they kept telling me. I can't remember the exact timeline but I do remember that it took FOREVER. I would dilate about a cm every 2 hours, and then get stuck for a few hours, and then dilate another cm, and on and on. I think it was sometime around midnight when I asked for the epidural. The nurse suggested that I go ahead and get it before things became unbearable because several women were laboring and the anesthesiologist was getting busy. I had heard horror stories about epidurals. Mine didn't hurt one bit. I couldn't believe it. I knew that the epidural made Jesse uneasy but there wasn't much I could do. This was all Friday.
I don't remember most of Saturday. Jesse was beginning to become unnerved at how "drugged up" I was. On top of the epidural, the Magnesium was making it difficult to keep my eyes open, carry on a conversation, move, etc. The only time there was any livelihood to me was when my contractions peaked. I got stuck at 9.5cm for about 4 hours and I started to get really mad.
Around 9pm I was finally fully dilated and they told me I could start pushing. I didn't know that you're only allowed to push for 3 hours. The pressure was on and I was exhausted. It had been over 30 hours since we arrived at the hospital and apparently the real work hadn't even started yet. Jesse was amazing. He coached me through every contraction, helped me breathe, and told me how great I was doing. Except I wasn't doing so great. They told me I should be able to feel the urge to push, but I couldn't feel much of anything. They dialed back my epidural, which made the contractions outrageous, and I still couldn't feel the urge to push. What I could feel was back labor. Holy Moly. A contraction would come, Jesse would watch the monitor and tell me when to start pushing, I would push 4 times for 10 seconds each, and then he and my mom or sister would have to immediately start massaging my back and thighs. It was terrible. I kept thinking how stupid it was that I was pushing a human being out of my body, and the only thing I could feel was razor blade pain in my thighs.
2 hours later we stopped to assess the progress. I think you could start to see baby's head, but he wasn't crowing and I was exhausted. The doctor suggested that I take a nap for an hour and then start pushing again. So I did. When they woke me up an hour later, I pushed a few more times. Then the doctor came back in and asked everyone to leave the room. She asked how I was doing, said she sensed some frustration, and asked me if I thought I could get this accomplished within an hour. I said no, and she said she didn't think so either. About 10 minutes later, 3 doctors were in my room. The head doctor said he felt like there was plenty of room for me to push out what he estimated to be a 7.5lb baby, however he didn't think I had the energy given the circumstances. The next thing I knew I was signing consents for a C-section, asking Jesse, "are you okay with this?" He later explained how unnerved he was that they were only communicating with me and only asked me to sign paperwork, considering how out of it I was.
They took Jesse away to get prepped for the surgery, and then wheeled me back into the operating room. Doctors should really be more careful about their conversations during C-Sections, keeping in mind that you can hear everything! The anesthesiologist and another doctor were complaining about how the head doctor was late, "as usual", and then one of them said, "well I guess we could go ahead and count everything." They prepped me, and then became annoyed when the head doctor came in and made them do everything all over again, in front of him. The operation itself only took about 10 or 15 minutes. I was happy to have Jesse next to me the whole time, but I'll admit, I fell asleep. I woke up when I heard, "wow that's a huge baby!" I thought I heard the doctor say "she", but Jesse says he said "he" and then another doctor said, "it's a surprise!" So at 1:04am on Sunday the 6th, he held Fletcher up and said, "it's a boy!" We got to look at him for a second and then they took him away. There was a team from pediatrics there because the magnesium causes babies to be very sleepy too, and they were worried Fletcher might have trouble breathing. Fortunately, he was a champ and didn't have any problems. They called Jesse over to cut the chord, then handed him over so Jesse could bring him to me. Perfection!
Jesse went with Fletcher back to our room to get cleaned up and beautified while they closed me up. Balboa is a teaching hospital, and the head doctor was teaching another doctor how to perform a C-Section. Lucky me. Every now and then I would hear him say, "no, not like that." "no, no", "try it like this" I could also hear them talking about how my 10lb baby had caused my uterus to become so big that the bleeding was excessive. The anesthesiologist kept telling me that I should close my eyes and take a nap because it might be awhile. It was the only time that I felt scared. I thought for sure if I closed my eyes then I would never wake back up.
About half an hour later they were all done and they wheeled me back to our room. They immediately placed Fletcher on top of me to nurse and everything worked beautifully. I don't remember how much time went by before everyone left. But we were left in our room with a brand new baby. Scary. I didn't close my eyes that night. I just held him in my bed, terrified that something would happen if I put him down. It was also scary that I couldn't move very well; I was afraid if I had Jesse put him in the bassinet then something would happen and I wouldn't be able to get to him. Needless to say we survived our first night as new parents.
